my new best friend
so i breed thicker skin and let my lustrous coat fill in and i'll never admit that i loved you...



i've lived here for about four months now. and i have never been happier this quickly with a new locale. i've found a social circle, i landed a job in the first week at a place that i adore, i'm starting grad school in the fall in a program i'm excited about.

i met the love of my life.

to top it off, i spent thursday evening with my roommate and her parents. at a car show. thirty minutes away. that took place at a drive-in movie theatre. across from a farm. we drank beer out of cans and wandered around looking at classic cars. then we ate italian sausages as quickly as we could so that the rain wouldn't make the rolls soggy.

life is good. i'm a happy girl.

breathing again


so i'll be honest. after the first post breakup day, my heart didn't hurt anymore. i was tiring of our relationship as well, but did want to give it a chance. his behavior during the two oddly stilted conversations we had helped make it official in my gut. he is not the man for me.

two days after the breakup, i found a place to live. and after that first night in my own room with my own stuff, i forgot what it was even like to be his girlfriend. i'm not angry or bitter or sad. and i feel more like ME than i have in a very long time. i feel revitalized. it's cheesy, i know, but i feel so very fucking alive and that a whole new life has begun.

a week or so after the breakup, a new friend of mine started talking to me. the timing is no good, and i wasn't planning on trying to jump into anything big this soon. i enjoy being single just as much as i enjoy being in a solid relationship, and i was looking forward to being alone again.

this friend knew all these things, but apparently had been thinking about me since the first day we met. and i realized that i had been thinking about him as well. i suddenly remembered all the times i would work him into conversations at home. i liked telling funny stories about him, or relating witty things he had said. but i wasn't considering him as an option, because i wasn't looking for any.

but now here he is. and it's unbelievable. i think, as bullshit romantic as it sounds, that he is the reason i had to move to western new york. him and grad school. which makes me happy, because the practicality of school grounds the fate-tastic arrival of this new relationship.

the icing on the cake is that my cats get along with my new roommate's cat. almost as well as me and the roommate get along. it's really kind of gross how happy i am right now.

plus paul just told me that joss wheden is working on a new comic book that will follow the lives of the buffy character post series finale. i can't fucking wait.