my new best friend
so i breed thicker skin and let my lustrous coat fill in and i'll never admit that i loved you...

is there a one?

i'm finding it harder and harder to decide. i want to love him like i should, but i want to be happy, too. the one that i do want will never be the one, either.

he's miles and miles away and will not be satisfied when i tell him that all i want him to do is hold me close and run his fingers through my hair. forever. that's it.

and write me witty emails everyday, of course.

i finally told the other that i didn't think i could stay.

we were both sad, but he understood more than i gave him credit for even moments before. things are the same today--he seems to think the purging of last night has plugged the hole. perhaps he's right...for now.

the hole will probably always be there. but i've got to try something else. i have to.

i have to.

this is just the test page.

i should probably do some actual work while i'm at work, so i'll write more later.

testing, testing, 1...2...3...